Do you remember when black books still existed? I think my last recollection of when people still owned black books was in the 90’s. Yes that would have put me in elementary school. For you youngin’s, I am referring to the ‘black book’ that men (and some women) used to keep track of their pool of potential sexual encounters. Seriously, has technology really taken over our lives? It seems as though we are that dependent on blackberries, I-phones and social media to help us remember our meetings, dates and phone numbers of potential booty calls. I know for a fact that even with technology, our memory span does us little good these days. So, you are thinking, “where is she going with this?”… well, let me tell you about an eye-opening conversation I had with my two friends over dinner earlier this evening.
Before I continue telling you about my fascinating conversation, let me give you the background on one of my male friends that made this conversation exist in the first place. I prefer to keep him anonymous; however I’d like to have a point of reference whenever I speak of him. When we first met over a year ago, he introduced himself to me at my job (mind you, he was on a date with another woman) and asked me if I knew about the “anaconda”? Ha, I thought to myself, what a f*cking joke of a pick-up line. But, hey, he got my attention and it worked. So since then, “anaconda” has stuck with me, therefore tonight we shall refer to him as ‘Mr. A’.
My buddy Mr. A is quite a character. He invited us to join him for dinner at Town, which happens to be a joint that he could probably be the official Mayor since he frequents this spot at least four times a week. I swear… this dude knows everyone and their mama, literally. You name it… he knows everyone from the college kids from UM, the foreigners visiting from Argentina, the owner, the bartenders and waitresses. I wouldn’t be surprised if he knew their grandmothers. Anyway, my point is…my buddy makes every effort to meet everyone that passes his way. Now, you can only imagine how his dating life is. And this is the reason why I bring up the ‘non-existent black book’. During dinner, I noticed Mr. A had two cell phones on the table. I ask him, “So, which phone is for all the hoes you pick up and please tell me my # is in the other phone!” He gave a smirk and continued to pass me the phone as I insisted to check out the real estate. My girlfriend and I laughed hysterically as I started fussing with his phone book. I was amazed, not at the amount of people in his phone, but how he referred to them. As I scrolled down the entire phone book to find names such as Brazilian, Dominican, Girl at Hard Rock, Black Hair Girl, Girl at Pool, Fat Chick, Stripper….OMG, with all the women you meet, do you not have the decency to remember their names, yet alone ASK them for their name before you jot their number down????? Ha, I was surprised, but at the same time, I wasn’t. My friend, Mr. A, is a classic player. And he’s damn good at what he does. Hence, this is the reason why I never entertained his ass.
And again, the Mayor strikes again. He introduced us to a girl that frequents this joint. Mr. A calls her Pocahontas and I quote him, “Man, I have been trying to hit that for over a year”. Folks, this girl goes to the same university as his daughter. Yes, you heard me…this 42 year old man is hittin’ girls that are probably in his daughter’s college Psychology class. True player, I tell you. When I asked him, what is it going to take for a woman to finally snatch you and make you want to settle down? He says, “Never gonna happen. I love being single.” It really hit me, being single is not for everyone, but it works for others.
Don’t get me wrong, I love my buddy Mr. A, but he can get real intense with the ladies. His breed is out there… and I’d classify him as the man you want to keep your daughters away from. In his eyes, there is no such thing as dating. His idea of a date is let’s go to the bar, let me buy you a drink…now finish your drink so I can go home and bang you. Believe it or not, I would say he has a 85% success rate. Not bad at all huh? Well, his persistency is what keeps him above the 80% percentile. Once he gauges a woman won’t budge, he moves on to the next one. In a way, I believe his strategy works. Women come crawling to him and you’ll find them making out in the first hour. Who knows what could happen in hour three…
Ladies, now the moral of the story: If you are single and still out on the market, you may need to aquire some of Mr. A’s pimp skills…and I am not referring to his player ways. When a dude is trying to talk to you, I don’t think it hurts if you play a little hard to get. At the end of the day, if we wants you….he’ll come running to you. And he’ll do it, it’s because he knows you are worth the effort. If dude doesn’t come back…then he wasn’t worth your time in the first place. On to the next, baby. Learn from Mr. A and waste no time.
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